[Scene starts up showing a view of Galaxy Hills Elementary School constantly inflating and deflating]
Hank: [off camera] Hooooolllld!
Kids: [off camera] Ummmmph!
Hank: [off camera] Hooooolllld.
Kids: [off camera] Ohhhhhh!
[School inflates again]
[We now show the classroom. The school is inflating because of the crowded kids holding up. They are holding Fanboy to the ground]
Hank: [off camera] Hooooolllld!
Kids: [spring up briefly] Ahhhhhh!
Hank: Don't give him an inch! [points to the clock] We still got ten seconds before summer vacation!
Kids: [spring again] Yeow!
Fanboy: [struggling] Must! Get! Out of school!
Chum Chum: Please, sir! I beseech thee! Let him go! He went the whole year with average attendance, hasn't he suffered enough? He just wants to go to the carnival! [points to a carnival out the window, the kids notice it]
Kids: CARNIVAL?!? YAAAAAAAYYYYY!!! [leave]
Hank: Don't forget to turn in your textbooks! [Gets covered by falling textbooks]
[Outside, the door opens and the kids run out]
Fanboy: [pause] FREEDOM!!!!!
[He and Chum Chum start to leave, but are stopped]
Hank: Hold it right there! No one leaves without turning in their textbook.
Fanboy and Chum Chum: Aww!
Chum Chum: Well, there's your desk.
Fanboy: Oh boy. [He and Chum Chum put on hard hats] Here we go. [Opens desk] You see anything?
Chum Chum: I see everything! Pencil stuffs, a sandwich crust, chewed erasers, a spit collection, ooh! There's that spelling test you got a D plus on.
Fanboy: I thought I put that on the fridge.
Chum Chum: You did! The fridge is on top of those rotten bananas.
Fanboy: Ahh. Alright, Chum Chum! One of us is gonna have to dive face first into that murky, festering, pile of garbage, while the other stays here in school.
Chum Chum: Buah, school? Not it! [jumps into the desk]
Fanboy: Huh? No fair, best 2 out of 3! [jumps into the desk]
[Several hours later at sunset...]
Fanboy: [Opens desk, textbook in hand] Got it!
[Bats fly out of the desk]
Fanboy: [Gasping, falls out of desk]
Chum Chum: [Gasping, falls out of desk]
Fanboy: Mr. Mufflin! I found the book! Mr. Mufflin?
Chum Chum: Uhh, Fanboy? Is school always this empty during the day?
[Show overview of empty room]
Fanboy: [gasp] Everybody's gone! Do you know what this means?
(Song: No Work And All Play)
Chum Chum: ♪ No teachers! ♪
Fanboy: ♪ No homework! ♪
Chum Chum: ♪ No clothing! ♪
Fanboy: ♪ Too far! ♪
Fanboy and Chum Chum: ♪ Yay! ♪
♪ We can chew bubblegum all day ♪
♪ It could be no work and all play ♪
♪ Run in the halls and talk, talk, talk ♪
♪ Powder our faces with chalk, chalk, chalk ♪
♪ Yiddie yodel, yiddie yodel, yippie yi yi yay ♪
♪ We're all alone in school, hooray!! ♪
Chum Chum: ♪ Lookee here, I pass notes to you ♪
Fanboy: ♪ And I make a hat with paste and glue ♪
Fanboy and Chum Chum: ♪ Ride our bikes all through the school ♪
♪ No one to say "Hey that's not cool" ♪
♪ Yiddie yodel, yiddie yodel, yippie yi yi yay ♪
♪ We're all alone in school, hooray! ♪
Fanboy: ♪ We're all alone there's no one in sight... ♪
Chum Chum: ♪ It's night and someone's turned off the light! ♪
Fanboy: ♪ I think I might be filled with...fright? ♪
♪ And the door is locked and bolted tight! ♪
Fanboy and Chum Chum: ♪ We're all alone in school!!! ♪
Fanboy: [pulls door] Locked! [pulls another door] Locked! [pulls a third door] Locked! Door, door, gotta find a door! [Draws door on blackboard and tries to open it, but to no avail] Oh, I drew it locked!
Chum Chum: [erases a key picture on another blackboard] And I just erased the key!
[Chum Chum moans. Suddenly, his shadow shoots upward and turns into Janitor Poopatine]
Russ: Trapped in school, eh?
Fanboy and Chum Chum: AHHHH!
Fanboy: Oh, Janitor Poopatine.
Chum Chum: [in slow motion] Poop.
Fanboy: Uhh! You have to help us, we're locked inside!
Russ: Oh, not to worry, let me just get my keys. [Shakes his sleeve and his keys roll out and head for a hole in the floor]
Russ, Fanboy and Chum Chum: Uh-oh!
[The keys continue to circle the hole as the three quiver. The keys stop]
Russ, Fanboy and Chum Chum: Phew. [the keys fall into the hole] Ahh!
Russ: Not to worry, I have a spare set. [Shakes sleeve, but those keys fall into the hole too] And...there they go.
Chum Chum: There's gotta be some other way to get out of here!
Russ: Hmm, perhaps there is.
[In the boys' restroom...]
Russ: A simple flush ought to take you boys to the septic tanker right outside the building.
Fanboy: Thank you so much, Janitor Poopatine!
Chum Chum: We'll never forget you!
Russ: [Flushes toilet] Bon Voyage! Have a nice trip!
Fanboy: So long!
Chum Chum: See you next fall!
Russ: Uh, don't drink the water!
Fanboy and Chum Chum: [cheering]
Fanboy: Vacation, here we come!
Chum Chum [laughing] So long!
Chum Chum: Here we go!
Fanboy: Oh, vacation, yeah!
Chum Chum: I love it!
[End of montage]
[Back at school...]
Russ: Nice boys, I hope they -- [turns and notices that F&C are in the sink] Oh, wha - ?
Fanboy: Believe me, we are just as confused as we are.
Chum Chum: Now, we're never gonna have a summer vacation!
Russ: Doh, vacation? Is that all you want? Well, why didn't you say so?
[In Russ's office...]
Russ: You have to promise not to tell anyone about my private getaway. I think you'll find my tropical island as fully vacational! Hmm hmm hmm, let me just turn up the sun...
[He turns on the lights, but all there is are plastic clouds and a set of mops in a sandbox]
Russ: Hope you brought lots of sunscreen!
Fanboy and Chum Chum: [dejected] Aww.
Chum Chum: Umm, isn't that the sand you put down when the kids throw up?
Russ: Don't be silly. [takes out a sandball] This sand has buried treasure! [the sand wears off revealing some sort of retainer] Oh, this must be an old pirate's retainer!
Chum Chum: [whispers] If he offers us clams, don't eat them.
Russ: Okay, now gather round the fire! I found my ukulele! [Strums a broom] ♪ Ne, Aloha Oe, Aloha Oe! ♪ [Continues singing, then exits]
Chum Chum: We're! Never! Gonna! Get! Out of! Here!
[He and Fanboy faint to the ground]
[Some time later, the boys wake up on the sandbox. They have strange beards on their faces]
Chum Chum: [gasps for breath] Fanboy...how...long...have we been here?
Fanboy: Ah! [Looks at watch] Four whole minutes.
Chum Chum: And...how long have we...had these beards? [Tugs at beard]
Fanboy: [Looks at fake watch] Three whole minutes.
Chum Chum: I...can't...take...it! We're gonna miss...a whole summer vacation! [starts crying]
Fanboy: Hey, Flappy! I think Chum Chum's starting to lose it!
Head flap: Eh. Next thing you know, you'll be talking to imaginary friends.
Fanboy: Ha ha, you're telling me. Good one, flaps. [hears carnival music, Chum Chum stops crying] Chum Chum, do you hear that?
[They look up and see a red balloon. It floats away]
Fanboy and Chum Chum: A balloon! [They chase it into a cave]
Russ: [comes in carring various toilet papers] I've found some fresh coconuts! They're already cracked and shelled. Just stick in your straw! [Notices them going into the cave] Wait! Where are you going? That's the Cave of Madness! Oh, wait. The Cave of Madness? That's over there. [Points to another cave with ghosts flying out of it] That's the Cave of Carnival-Related Delusions. Oh, I'm sure they will be all right. [Drinks from a toilet paper and leaves]
[Meanwhile, in the cave, F&C follow the balloon to what they believe is a carnival]
Fanboy: [gasp] The carnival! It came to us!
Chum Chum: Look how beautiful it is. [points to a wad of cobwebs] Look! Cotton Candy!
[They are taken into a carnival fantasy as they imagine the cobwebs as cotton candy. Lenny appears, with pink hair]
Fanboy: Hey! It's Lenny! [Lenny gives them each a cone] Thanks, Lenny!
[They each make out their snacks and eat it, not knowing they're actually eating cobwebs]
Chum Chum: [Eats his cobweb and laughs. Bugs come out of his mouth]
Fanboy: [Eats his cobweb] Delicious! [Laughs. Bugs come out of his mouth] Look! A fun house!
Fanboy and Chum Chum: Yay!
[They head for what they believe is a funhouse]
[Soon, F&C are being stretched on the mechanisms, but they're actually giant scorpions. They are then flinged away]
[On what F&C believe is a rollercoaster, they fall down a hill which is actually a lavafall. They hit the lava]
[At what F&C believe is a dunk tank. Fanboy is the dummy, while Chum Chum is the player. He throws a rock which hits the "target" and the rock holding Fanboy breaks, making him fall into the hole below him]
Chum Chum: Do I get a prize?
Chum Chum: Come on, Mr. Fluffykins, it's time to go into the Tunnel of Love.
Fanboy and Chum Chum: Mmmm!
[They enter the tunnel. Smooches are heard. Then, F&C come out. They have kiss marks on their heads as they laugh, then realize what happened]
Fanboy: Wait a second. You're not my pillow.
Chum Chum: And you're not my favorite bath toy, Captain Squeakybottom.
Fanboy: Uhh, Chum Chum, I'm beginning to think that this isn't really a carnival.
Chum Chum: Oh, come on! If this isn't a carnival, then how did I win this stuffed... [Pulls up a real female bear]
Fanboy and Chum Chum: BEAR!!! AHHHHHH!!! [Run through cave]
Fanboy: It's hopeless, Chum Chum. I'm afraid there's just no light at the end of this tunnel.
Chum Chum: Yeah, there's only that one! [points to a light] On the ceiling!
Fanboy: What? [Sees the light] A door to outside! Come on! Chum Chum, if my pillow were the jealous type, I'd kiss you.
[They jump up and reach the light]
[Fanboy and Chum Chum come out of a desk and realize they're at the beach]
Fanboy: We made it, Chum Chum! Oh, I've never been so excited for Summer in my whole life!
Hank: [off camera] Well, I hope you're as excited for Summer School. [Scene zooms out to reveal F&C are back in the classroom, in front of a beach backdrop reading "Welcome to Summer School"]
Fanboy and Chum Chum: Summer School?!? Awwww!
Hank: That's where you go when you fail every -- [Stops to hear F&C drop back into the desk] Hey, where'd they go?
[Back in the cave, Fanboy and Chum Chum are once again, being stretched by scorpions]
Fanboy: Well, it may not be pleasant, but it'd sure beat Summer School!
[A bear growls off-camera]
Chum Chum: Relax! You'll get your turn.
"Back From The Future"