| Except you need the sun for that, you idiot!!!
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[Scene opens up in the school cafeteria]
Fanboy: Okay, chum chum. You know the rules of lost and found roulette. Whatever your face can grab, your face can keep. Ready, go!
[they stick their heads inside the Lost and Found bin. Chum Chum raises his head, revealing he has a retainer on his teeth]
Chum Chum: Yay! I got an old retainer. It still tastes like peanut butter!
[Fanboy raises his head, he's wearing glasses]
Fanboy: All I got is a splitting headache.
Chum Chum: You got glasses.
Fanboy: I did? Hey, you know what these would be good for?
Chum Chum: Astigmatism?
Fanboy: No. A secret identity. Think about it. It's essential for any aspiring superhero.
00:05:26 .. 00:05:29 Norm normal. 00:05:31 What a beautiful tuesday. 00:05:33 Huh. a-heh. 00:05:35 A-heh. 00:05:35 - Wow, norm. 00:05:36 Your manner, it's so mild! 00:05:39 - Well, it's just another facet on the fanboy diamond, making me that much more prepared for the day when I unsuspectingly stumble into a radioactive accident, thereby fulfilling my destiny. 00:05:53 - I hope you're belted by gamma rays. 00:05:56 - Thank you, chum chum. 00:05:57 That means a lot to me.
Lupe: [screaming] Spider! Somebody save me!
00:06:06 - You see that spider, chum chum? 00:06:08 - Uh-huh. 00:06:09 - It's radioactive. 00:06:10 - Do you know what a bite from that spider would mean? 00:06:13 - It means move over, fish sticks, .. 00:06:17 Is superpowers. 00:06:20 - Yeah! 00:06:22 - Bite me! 00:06:23 thump! squish! 00:06:24 Okay, spider, do your worst! 00:06:29 - Uh, fanboy, I think you did your worst to the spider. 00:06:33 - Huh? aww. 00:06:35 Well, maybe a smush is as good as a bite. 00:06:39 I can already feel my spider sense coursing through my spider veins. 00:06:44 Time to test out my super spider web shooter. 00:06:48 [grunting] Oh, my web is so thin, it's almost invisible. 00:06:56 thud! 00:06:57 I seem to have lost all spidey sensation from the waist down. 00:07:01 - Fanboy, I don't think you got any superpowers. 00:07:05 - Well, there'll be other opportunities. 00:07:07 As long as we remain ever vigilant, and the caf-- -
Lupe: Hi, fanboy.
Fanboy: Oh, Hi, lupe.
Fanboy: Okay, I thought we already covered that territory, but hello again. Now I'll just be on my-- -
Lupe: You saved me from the spider. You're my superhero boyfriend.
Fanboy: You hear that, chum chum? I'm so awesome, I save people without even-- whoa! Super what now?
Lupe: Superboyfriend. I can hear your heart whispering to me. [indistinct whispering] [giggling] Your heart is funny. Chum Chum: If you think his heart's funny, you should hear his butt! 00:07:54 - [farts] - [laughs] What timing! 00:07:58 - [laughs nervously] Okay, let's get one thing straight. 00:08:01 I am not your-- - yes, but-- - [shushes] - [indistinct protests] - [shushing] - [indistinct protests] - Ooh, fanboy. 00:08:13 You gave me your heart. 00:08:15 I'm going to press it in my scrapbook. 00:08:19 See you tomorrow, fanboyfriend. 00:08:23 - UH... thunk! 00:08:24 [bell rings] - Oh, hi there. 00:08:27 You must be new to the school. 00:08:29 - I am norm normal. 00:08:30 It's a pleasure to meet you for the first time--whoa! 00:08:34 [chuckles] Boy, I am such a klutz. 00:08:37 But I guess that's to be expected from someone who is so mild-mannered and not at all super. 00:08:43 How am I doing? 00:08:45 - Hi, fanboy. 00:08:47 Miss me? 00:08:49 ..me, fanboy? 00:08:52 I wish. 00:08:53 [chuckles] That guy is awesome! 00:08:56 Right? ha! 00:08:57 Lupe, go away! 00:08:58 You're blowing my cover. 00:08:59 - Speaking of cover, I made you a sweater. 00:09:03 - Yeah, that's great, lupe, but I don't need a--sweater. 00:09:07 - Ooh. 00:09:08 You look good in taupe. 00:09:09 - Well, that's because I'm an autumn. 00:09:11 But I don't want it. 00:09:12 - [giggles] - I appreciate the gesture, but superheroes do not need sweaters. 00:09:16 - But what if man-arctica blasts you with ice? 00:09:20 - I'll fly towards the sun. 00:09:22 - But space is so chilly. 00:09:24 - Then I'll hide in an asteroid! 00:09:26 - And what if it's drafty? 00:09:28 - Then I'll hurdle it towards earth and it'll heat up during re-entry. 00:09:32 [screams] Argh! 00:09:35 I don't need a sweater! 00:09:39 [zapping] clunk! 00:09:42 - Fanboy! 00:09:43 I think you have electro powers! 00:09:46 - [gasps] ELECTRO POWERS? 00:09:48 You hear that, lupe? ha ha! 00:09:50 Now I can never be your boyfriend. 00:09:52 For if I were to touch any mortal with these hands-- - good thing I made you mittens. 00:09:58 Now I can hold your pretty electric hand. 00:10:02 - [groans] Ugh, she held my hand for, like, five hours. 00:10:07 - Good thing she crushed all your fingers. 00:10:10 Then you were able to slip free. 00:10:14 - Yeah, high five! 00:10:16 [shattering and screaming] - Fanboyfriend, you're home! 00:10:21 - Lupe? 00:10:22 How did you get in? 00:10:24 - His and her windows. 00:10:25 For watching sunsets. 00:10:28 - Lupe, let me explain. 00:10:29 It's not that I don't wantto be your boyfriend, it's that ican't be your boyfriend. 00:10:34 It's against the superhero code. 00:10:38 - Not anymore. 00:10:39 First, blast zone started seeing the invisible shield-- well, I mean, he never literally saw her, but, you know. 00:10:45 And then the jade javelin held hands with infrared. 00:10:49 And of course, magnetboy and girl of steel are inseparable now. 00:10:53 - Oz, what are you doing here? 00:10:54 - I like the ice from your fridge better. 00:10:57 Oh, and I just read that octoped is back with sea cow. 00:11:01 - Oh, will you please leave? 00:11:04 - [sighs and giggles] - Fine. 00:11:06 If you won't leave, then I will! 00:11:10 poof! [grunts] - Fanboyfriend? 00:11:16 Where did you go? 00:11:18 Oh, there you are. 00:11:20 If you wanted a kiss, all you had to do was ask. 00:11:25 - Whoa! 00:11:28 I can't believe she kissed me. 00:11:32 - Maybe lupe's your arch-nemesis. 00:11:36 - Arch-nemesis. 00:11:38 That gives me an idea. 00:11:39 If lupe wants a superhero boyfriend, .. 00:11:44 And all the danger that comes with it. 00:11:48 - I am so happy you invited me to a picnic. 00:11:53 It's so beautiful here. 00:11:54 I've never seen the power plant before. 00:11:59 - Yeah, I come here sometimes to think or if I want the toxic fumes to alter my dna. 00:12:04 But mainly it's a nice way to get away from my arch-nemesis. 00:12:09 - That's what you think, fanboy! 00:12:13 - [gasps] OH, MY GOSH! 00:12:14 It's my arch-nemesis, toxic tea pot! 00:12:18 - Yes. 00:12:19 It is i, toxic tea pot, with my handle of horror and my spout of doom. 00:12:26 - Fanboy, who is that? 00:12:29 - The toxic tea pot. 00:12:31 He said it twice. 00:12:33 Toxic tea pot, how ever did you find me? 00:12:37 - I have diabolical ways. 00:12:39 After all, I am your sworn nemesis. 00:12:43 - And also my enemy. 00:12:45 But I will stop you .. 00:12:49 Lupe. 00:12:50 - Ooh! 00:12:51 - I think it's time to wrap this picnic up. 00:12:57 - Whoa! - ayee! 00:12:59 - [laughs maniacally] [whistle blows] You hear that, fanboy? 00:13:03 My toxic tea leaves are now fully steeped. 00:13:07 Say good-bye to the one you love-- lupe! 00:13:12 - Ooh! 00:13:13 - How could I have been so careless? 00:13:16 Now you see why superheroes can't have girlfriends. 00:13:19 You do see that, right? 00:13:21 - Yes. 00:13:22 I see now that our love can never be. 00:13:25 Here, a lock of hair to remember me by. 00:13:30 Good-bye forever, fanboy. 00:13:33 - Run, lupe! 00:13:34 And don't look back. 00:13:35 And I'm really quite serious about that last part. 00:13:40 Eww! 00:13:41 - [panting] thud! 00:13:48 - chomp! - AYEE! 00:13:49 - Chum chum, she is gone. 00:13:52 - It's about time. 00:13:53 My spout's starting to cramp. 00:13:56 - [sighs] We can finally downgrade the girlfriend threat level to yellow. 00:14:00 [rumbling] both: WHOA. 00:14:02 [both scream] - So, toxic tea pot, you thought you could mess with fanboy, eh? 00:14:12 Well, that was before I got bit .. 00:14:17 Ant lupe. 00:14:19 - Guh! 00:14:20 - [screaming] [scream fades] - Lupe? 00:14:24 - Ants can lift 200 times their own body weight. 00:14:29 And now so can i. 00:14:30 - Wait, wait, wait. you're a superhero now? 00:14:33 With real superpowers? 00:14:35 That is so cool. 00:14:38 - Yes. 00:14:39 Well, I have to go dig my super secret anthill lair. 00:14:44 - Wait! 00:14:46 I just thought if you weren't busy, maybe we could hang out or whatever. 00:14:50 You kno I could come see your lair. 00:14:53 - [shushes] I'm sorry, fanboy. 00:14:56 I am a superhero now, and superheroes cannot have boyfriends. 00:15:01 It's against superhero code. 00:15:03 - But not anymore. 00:15:04 What about blast zone and sea cow? 00:15:07 Call me. 00:15:09 - Hey, fanboy, what's wrong? 00:15:10 - Hey, chum chu-- how are you doing that? 00:15:14 - Lupe threw me so high that I soaked up cosmic rays. 00:15:19 Now I can fly! 00:15:21 - You have superpowers too? 00:15:25 .. 00:15:26 And invisibility. 00:15:27 Oh, and laser beam eyes. 00:15:30 Where are you going, fanboy? 00:15:32 - To find some radioactive ants. 00:15:36 [farts] - [laughs] What timing!